Don’t pay any attention buddy, nobody else does😂
I love being appreciated especially by my scottish fans 
Two sailors hanging on grimly to an iceberg in the middle of the Atlantic after their ship had sunk, one sailor says"do you think we’ll get rescued"the second sailor says "Yeh of course we will here comes the Titanic😂
Fans “plural” is pushing it a bit eh😂
You are too modest pal
After I posted I realised you would come back with that, Fuck, Fuck!!! 
Sorry to disappoint,will try better next time
He was a bit shy, and after she had thrown her arms around him and kissed him for bringing her a bouquet of flowers, he arose and started to leave.
“I’m sorry I offended you,” she said.
“Oh, no, I’m not offended,” he replied. “I’m going for more flowers.”
A hobbit, an elf and a dwarf stand in the forest and relieve themselves.
The hobbit who finishes first goes to the nearby stream to wash his hands and says to the two, “I was taught from a young age to wash my hands after peeing.”
The Elf who finishes second also goes to the stream to wash himself. “I was taught not only to wash my hands after peeing, but also to clean my arms, neck and face.”
When the dwarf finishes, he walks past the two to the camp to have another ■■■■. The hobbit and the elf look at him puzzled and ask at the same time: “And what about you?”
Says the dwarf, sipping his ■■■■: “I was taught when I was a c___d not to pee on myself.”
More jokes please
Come on @letsdothis you’re slacking 
Guy jumps on a bus only for the driver to say"sorry I cram jam full"
The guy says"i don’t want to know your name I want to get on the bus"
After having their 11th c___d, a TN mountain couple decided 11 was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.
So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn’t want to have any more c___dren.
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive.
A less costly alternative, said the doctor, was to go home, get a cherry bomb (fireworks are legal in the TN mountains), light it, put it in an empty ■■■■ can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.
The redneck said to the doctor, “I may not be the sharpest knife in the box, but I don’t see how putting a cherry bomb in a ■■■■ can next to my ear is gonna help me.”
“Trust me,” said the doctor.
So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb, and put it in a ■■■■ can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count:
“1”
“2”
“3”
“4”
“5”
At which point he paused, placed the ■■■■ can between his legs, and resumed counting on his other hand.
This procedure also works in Kentucky, Louisiana, Arkansas, Alabama, and parts of Mississippi.
1 Like
Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their grandkids overnight.
When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his grandson’s medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills.
The grandson said, “I don’t think you should take one. They’re very strong and very expensive.”
“How much?” asked Grandpa.
“$10.00 a pill,” he replied.
“I don’t care,” said Grandpa, “I’d still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I’ll put the money under your pillow.”
Later the next morning, the grandson awoke and found $110 under his pillow.
He called Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10, not $110.
“I know,” said Grandpa. “The hundred is from Grandma!”
1 Like
